"It's a tapered pole. I'm very good at flagpoles." - Donnie F Trump 8-19-26
I've been sleeping like Rip Van Winkle for 2 days. I have to catch all of you up on the news.
"If you lose at playing Bogart you're better on your own." - Any Trouble
Last Monday Diaper Donnie canceled all military exercises with South Korea because he's in love with the dictator of North Korea. Attention Whore Nancy Mace now has a You Tube channel where she wears underwear and shows off her tattoos.
On Tuesday the Secretary of Scotch Petey was in Iowa campaigning for a Republican idiot. He's a sexual dynamo and a Warfighter.
On Wednesday the vivacious sister of Miss Lindsey Graham said she knew nothing about foreign affairs but she supports the military. I fight crime at night in a skin tight costume.
On Thursday frosted cranberry Pop Tarts were released and science has gone too far again. The USS Abraham Lincoln was sent home after 275 days at sea and Donnie "Two Scoops " Trump is still looking for his winkie.
On Friday Chandelier Stomach saw his letters from Natalie Harp published and she's fucking crazy. Towns in Indiana have not had power and water in 2 weeks, but Melania is having intimate moments with a toy we don't have or want.
On Sunday before "Meet The Press" came on local TV showed the return of the beautiful blonde Natalie Nunn. She's better looking than me!
Then it was time for "Meet the Press." I have watched this show for 40 years. It blows now beyond belief. Tim Scott was on. Chris Van Hollen was on. Brush my teeth and call me Smiley. It was terrible! I went to bed and didn't wake up for 22 hours. Life goes on, cats!
When you're doing all right, your friends are jealous of you.
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